The View from the Spaghetti Factory (proper redesign coming soon!)

Despite the increasing trend for displays of mass (and fake) emotion here in post-Diana Britain, it’s reassuring to note that when the shit really hits the fan, the black humour and quizzically raised eyebrow quickly return. After the 7 July 2005 bombings, the sarcastic posts to the London Hurts LiveJournal page made me guffaw, and Jeremy’s description of the BBC’s calm continuity was the perfect encapsulation of a peculiarly British type of national non-pride.

So when our country is targeted by the Special Needs Division of al Qaeda (thanks to DHM for making me giggle with that one) it’s good to see that our response is, once again, utterly appropriate.

Yep, that’s right, we’re going to put on our best clothes and go marching!

(Thanks to James Bardolph for permission to use his groovy photo from Pride London 2007)

I’m coming to this a bit late (after a week in Derbyshire followed by a busy week of work) so I’m probably only going to be repeating what everyone else has said, but never mind.

Yep, it’s crap, isn’t it?

I’m usually sceptical when the Great British Public is said to be united for or against something. The media have a habit of craftily spinning the uninformed rantings of a large minority into the “view of the common people”. In this case, though, the response really does seem to be of almost unanimous derision and ridicule. I mean, what kind of graphic designer really thought that the style of 1986 kids’ TV idents was due for a revival? Even at the time, they never used that sort of style for Olympic logos!

Now, I’m no expert on graphic design, but it’s pretty clear to me that a number of qualities should be present in a good logo… it should be instantly and unambiguously recognisable, it should be easy to reproduce in a variety of media and it should contain something reminiscent of the product or concept it represents. This jagged mess certainly doesn’t say “London” to me. Fair enough, it does say “2012″ if you squint enough, while simultaneously trying not to think of what Lisa Simpson is doing, but it doesn’t even represent the Olympics properly… they’ve had to colour all the rings white to fit the design. Gah!

On the other hand, here’s the logo they used for the Olympic bid. It’s fairly conservative, but it does the job… the text tells you exactly what it represents, the Olympic rings are shown in their traditional colours, and those colours are repeated in the five-strand ribbon which outlines the shape of the river Thames. With some tweaking, that could be a perfectly good logo for the actual Games, and a worthy addition to a long line of classic emblems.

But of course, that wouldn’t happen, would it? We’re dealing with corporate brands here, and the bid was a different product altogether. As Chris Townsend, commercial director of the 2012 Olympics, said to the Guardian, “It is designed as a proper consumer brand rather than a corporate brand you’ve seen in other games and it will stand alongside all the other leading sports brands.” Riiiiight.

Ah well, that’s my rant over. I’m just sorry that we’re going to miss out on the best logo of all. Briefly shown as one of the alternative designs submitted by readers of the BBC website, it was then removed. In a just world, Sean Stayte’s design would be the official logo for the 2012 Olympics (more info here and there’s now a t-shirt! Everybody buy one!)

Having occasionally been known to post “Have Your Say” comments on news websites, often with tongue planted firmly in cheek, I guffawed heartily at the reader responses to this story from the Surrey Comet…

Marksman called in to kill Kingston’s pigeons

What tickled me in particular was the genuine response from (presumably) an old lady, standing like a flimsy barrier of normality against the oncoming surreal flood. We’re a witty bunch down here in SW London, y’know.

For everyone in the South-East, wondering whether or not to start filling saucepans (or for people not in the SE, wondering what the fuss is about) here’s a good BBC article about the figures behind the drought orders…

Spin between the raindrops

I don’t usually find myself agreeing with cosy middle class bluster and outrage (”I pay my bleedin’ taxes, and for this!”) but this whole thing is quite ridiculous. I’m paying £200 a year for the local water company to lose a couple of Lake Windermeres every week. There’ll be civil disobedience once the lupins start to flower, mark my words!

On a serious note, the fault doesn’t lie entirely with the water companies. Wandering the suburban avenues here in Sutton, I’ve noticed that the trend for totally paved driveways and front gardens is increasing rapidly, to the point where houses with traditional front gardens are almost in the minority. A decent shower of rain results in most of the water rushing straight into the storm drains, rather than seeping into the soil. However, if the water suppliers continue to display this bullish and uncompromising attitude, they can’t expect much give and take from the consumers.

Our back garden, by the way, is looking pretty lush. Drought, eh?

Network Rail have an unenviable task in repairing and maintaining our rail infrastructure after years of neglect, while trying to create the minimum of disruption to the regular service. In the long run, most rail users would probably accept a few weekends of inconvenience in return for a better service in the future.

Yesterday morning, though, I wondered if they have access to PR advisers or, better still, a calendar. To shut down a large chunk of the south London suburban network (basically, a triangle between Sutton, Croydon and Streatham) for 24 hours is never going to be a popular move, but to do so on the day of the London Marathon, when hundreds of thousands of people congregate in central London from all over the country… well, what can you say?

Anyway, enough complaining. Despite the reduced transport options and the rain, the Marathon was a great spectator event, with plenty of plucky determination, joviality and general backslapping. Congratulations to everyone who took part, for whatever reason.

London Marathon 2006 photos on Flickr

Just a follow-up to the previous entry, really. A collection of links relating to the aftermath of the London terrorist attacks…

Good comprehensive sources of information can now be found on the BBC’s dedicated mini-site and the Wikipedia entry.

The group (supposedly) responsible for the attacks claims that “Britain is now burning with fear, terror and panic in its northern, southern, eastern, and western quarters.”. Yeah, right. One way of showing your defiance is to post a picture to We’re not Afraid!

For people who want to make a more public show of their fearlessness, there’s a pledge over on Pledgebank to organise a public demonstration. They need 2500 people in total… an hour or so milling about in London isn’t much to ask, is it?

Above all, we’re British… when stuff goes wrong, our main worry is how long we should keep a respectful silence before we can start emailing jokes to each other. Some sincere and well-meaning Americans started a LiveJournal community to show their sympathy for London. And it’s so sweet of them. It’s just that… well, they kind of misjudged just how unsentimental we can be. Read London Hurts for yourself, starting at the bottom of the page.

There isn’t much to say which hasn’t already been said umpteen times.

Of course, we’d been told that a major terrorist attack on London was inevitable, but when it’s just a possibility, even just an *inevitability*, it’s always going to be tomorrow. It only becomes tangible and believable when it’s today.

With the initial flush of information and statistics now over, the media are still in full flow, desperately trying to fill the extended news slots they feel obliged to dedicate to the tragedy. TV reporters are standing in the rain outside every London hospital, gamely parroting everything they’ve learned about the number of patients, the type of injuries, the determined faces of the staff. The red bus and faithful tube train have already been described as precious icons of London. No doubt the newspapers are trying to decide just how many pages to dedicate to the disaster in tomorrow’s edition. The royal wedding got 16 pages? Then no less than 19 will do! Of the terrestrial TV channels, ITV impressed me by managing to establish a few real facts much more quickly than the BBC this morning, but then spoiled it all with their ridiculous “TARGET LONDON” logo on the evening bulletin. I really don’t want to see the tabloids tomorrow.

But at the end of it all, the important points can be covered in just one line. People, just like you and me, were killed on their way to work by other people stupid enough to think they’re following their religion.

Life goes on, though, and Jeremy has the best description…